


First Step on the Path

by OfMonstersAndWerewolves



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Brief References to Menstruation/Periods/PMS, Canon Compliant, Deaf Character, F/F, Fluff, Long Term Effects of Isolation, Mental Health Issues, Post-Canon, Prompt Fic, Romani Character, Sign Language, Wanting a baby, broodiness, but in the baby sense not the angsty sense
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:35:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24650926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OfMonstersAndWerewolves/pseuds/OfMonstersAndWerewolves
Summary: Alice's thoughts on being a mother had developed over the years: from the imaginative fantasies of a young child, to the plausible hope of a woman so full of love.She and Robin had had talks about parenthood before, but an encounter with Zephyr, the son of their friends Esmeralda and Phoebus, might just finally set them on the path to fulfilling their desire once and for all.
Relationships: Alice | Tilly/Robin | Margot
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9
Collections: Prompt Challenge





	First Step on the Path

**Author's Note:**

> I'm taking part in a short prompt challenge to occupy me for these next few weeks or so. I have 5-7 days to complete it in, and here's what I came up with.
> 
> Prompt - **'Your ship want to try for a baby'**
> 
> This is somewhat of a sequel to 'The Future is Ours', and a prequel to 'Happy Accidents'. I'd actually had this idea in my head for quite some time before the prompt challenge came about.
> 
> I've tried to research as much as I could about both Romani and deaf/HoH folk, as I'm neither. However, due to the time limitations I've kept references relatively minimal, particularly with the former, as I didn't feel it was my story to tell, and I didn't feel confident enough with the knowledge I had to include too much more. Since my last deaf character in 'Now That I See You' I've changed the way I've written sign language to keep with the recommendations I saw regarding how to write it. Apologies, regardless, if anything isn't quite right in that regard.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Alice had been open to having children. Stuck in a tower, one could only do so much. It had been one of many things she’d daydream about living within its walls day after day, at least at first anyway. 

As a small child, she’d imagine herself going out to sea, fighting off the deadly kraken and finding some mysterious buried treasure to share with the people she’d met. She’d imagine herself flying on the back of dragons, soaring over rivers and mountains to new lands far away. She’d imagine herself rescuing a princess from the clutches of an evil sorceress and living happily ever after together in a magical castle.

And occasionally, she’d imagine herself with a baby, or a small child, singing them sweet lullabies or playing hide and seek out in the wilderness.

But though her hope never left, it did wane. Not even the heart of the Guardian could hold on forever, no matter how ‘pure’ it apparently was. The longer she stayed trapped, the less ambitious her dreams became. It wasn’t as bad when her papa was with her, but after he’d gone? She’d have been grateful to smell the salt of the sea air for herself, or feel the grass under her feet, or meet someone – anyone – new.

The idea of having a baby? That faded to the back of her mind; a wild fantasy amongst an ocean of its likeminded peers. It wasn’t gone, and she would occasionally bring it up again as a story or tale to tell her stuffed animal friends.

But that was it. A story. 

It wasn’t that her hope had gone; she still had faith she’d escape. Somehow. But spend enough time alone, caged in with your own childhood and even the purest of hearts will struggle. Hope was a powerful thing, but so was doubt. In order to protect her from that growing sliver of uncertainty, her mind focused itself on the here and now, and the good and kindness she knew existed. The future would come, but specifics beyond escaping and curing her papa were minimal; her dreams optimistic, but vague.

She had no real clue what was in store for her.

And then she escaped.

It had stayed at the back of her mind for many a year. There were so many fantastical adventures, so many corners of realms to traverse, so many parts of herself and the worlds around her to explore for the first time, that the concept barely so much as shifted from its buried position for a number of years.

But as time went on, Alice found that it started to pop up, faint and distant certainly, but there all the same. Sometimes it happened when a relevant occasion arose, other times when she least expected it.

The first time the idea reappeared in any real meaningful and memorable way, she’d been strolling along on some romantic walk through the woods, hand in hand with Robin, her calm, contented mind off on some adventure of its own with imagination, as minds so often do, embracing the hopeful potential of their future.

Marriage. Ooh, maybe a cat or two. Her papa, with his cured heart, taking her out on trips on the Jolly Roger. The whole world at her fingertips. A beautiful life full of love and warmth and kindness and…

Kids.

Did Robin want kids? Did **she** want kids? She’d long ago forgotten about those wishes as a child and the promise she’d made if she ever became a mother.

But it was in that moment, that carefree moment, lost in her own mind with Robin, that she realised. For the first time. 

She finally had a chance.

She **could** have kids in the future, if she wanted to.

She could be a mother.

“You ok?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“You looked deep in thought. What were you thinking about?”

She’d grinned then, a little whimsically. “Us.”

* * *

But the idea was still in its infant stage of being a plausible reality, and it stayed like that for not a short period of time. Besides, her focus was primarily on curing her papa. Still, it would show up every now and again, and the idea had inched just that tad bit closer to the front of her mind.

Only after the dark curse, and that afflicting her papa’s heart, had been broken, did the idea of having kids really start to take root in her mind. The time she had to finally embrace her new happy beginning began to wake those long lost dreams that had yet to stretch their legs. 

It was little things at first: a father teaching his toddler son to walk, a crying kid running to their mum for comfort, an elderly gentleman passing a sentimental item on to his granddaughter, the emotional reunion of a family. But each one added another layer to the growing sense of want she felt to experience something like it for herself and her family.

The talk by the light of the fire, stolen horse tied someway behind their tent, assuaged Alice’s nervousness and worry as to whether Robin wanted kids herself, at least for a while.

But it would be several years later before she began to consider the option seriously; years later before she would really feel like she and Robin were ready to take on such a momentous adventure. This massive life decision they’d never be able to turn back on once they’d passed a certain checkpoint.

Were they ready for this? She’d thought about it so much recently and decided that **she** was at least. Was Robin? Did Robin even still want kids. What if she’d changed her mind? What if something had put her off in the years since?

The catalyst that lead to these questions being answered would come to her one ordinary day.

* * *

They were having tea when the stone gargoyle rapped its knuckles against their front door. No sooner had he got the chance to inform them Esmeralda and Phoebus’ son had been born, and that they were welcome to come and meet him, than Alice had torn up the stairs of the cabin to get her stuff ready to go. 

He waited patiently for them to come out again, and eventually they did, the portal-summoning looking glass in Alice's backpack. The portal materialised in front of them, and the gargoyle spread his wings and flew through with ease.

With her hand clutching Robin’s, Alice thought with all her mind, focusing her magic on the portal, and asking it to let them 'follow the gargoyle'. Giving each other a glance, they ran, leaping through the portal to come out beside a huge lake. The commotion of their arrival meant that it wasn’t long before Esmeralda herself came out to greet them, a bundle carried in her arms.

“Oh Esmerelda, he’s beautiful.”

“Thank you, Alice.”

“What’s his name?” she asked, bringing a finger to his arm.

“Zephyr. And he was early,” she answered. “We’re only a few days away from the nearest town. We were hoping we’d have reached it before he arrived.”

“Guess he had other ideas, huh?” Robin said.

“That he did.”

“Alice!”

She turned in the direction of the caller, his voice instantly recognisable to her. “Quasi!”

He ran up to her, a pair of gargoyles coming up behind him, and engulfed her in a hug.

“It’s so nice to see you again,” he signed.

“Likewise,” she signed back to him.

She and Quasimodo had become fast friends given their similar upbringings, trapped and isolated from the rest of the world. His was a long story, some of which not even she was privy to knowing, but she knew of the abuse he had endured and the slow recovery he’d taken to get where he was now. His kindness was infectious, and they’d spent many a time together, joking with each other and getting into perhaps not a small amount of mischief. 

She’d never had the discourtesy of meeting the late Judge Claude Frollo, and she was glad of it. His death had been of no sorrow to the Romani people in the region, long having been persecuted under his wrath, and Esmeralda in particular very rarely talked about him.

But he didn’t matter right now.

“I see you’ve already met little Zephyr.”

“He’s gorgeous!”

Another aspect that differed between their two stories was that Alice’s tower hadn’t possessed within its walls several huge bells that had rang out every single day. The largest of these bells now sat at the bottom of a lake, not dissimilar to the one they were situated beside now, and it pleased him to know this, being aware first-hand how much damage it had caused his hearing.

Learning verbal or written languages didn’t come to her nearly as easily, but Alice, though not quite being fluent, had certainly come a long way in the sign language he communicated with. Robin hadn’t got the hang of it quite as well, but she could usually get her point across well enough.

“Have you held him yet?”

She shook her head, before glancing at Esmeralda.

“Go on then. Seeing as though it’s you, Alice,” Esmeralda said, gently passing Zephyr over to her.

“Well, I’m starving and there’s some food on the go. Care to join us?” Quasimodo asked Robin, Alice having been thoroughly distracted by the baby in her arms.

“Lead the way.”

* * *

Robin didn’t think it was possible to get so lost in the eyes of a newborn. She didn’t even realise she was until she caught his mother looking over at her, a self-conscious blush no doubt dappling her cheeks. They were currently in Esmeralda’s wagon. Alice was... somewhere.

“Have you and Alice ever thought about adding to that, uh… complicated family tree of yours?”

Robin snickered at the not untrue comment, but her expression relaxed again as she watched Zephyr in her arms. 

Having kids with Alice was something Robin had contemplated over the years and come to the conclusion each time that she wanted to. Very much so, in fact.

The idea had grown on her as she had, going from ‘No way!’ as a young child, to ‘ok, maybe it’s not the most horrific thing in the world, perhaps if I meet the right women’ as a late teen. As of right that moment, she had reached ‘I’ve never wanted anything more than having Alice’s babies’, although she wasn’t entirely sure whether that wasn’t partially down to PMS.

The question had been ‘when’ not ‘if’ for quite a while now, but it was all very much dependant on what Alice wanted. 

“We’ve… well, we’ve talked about it a few times. We want kids, but… it never felt like the right time before-” She cut herself off then. “I mean… she hasn’t said anything about it in a while…”

Esmeralda gazed at her. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were looking a little broody.”

“The baby kind of broody or the angsty kind? Cause I can be either on any given day. You only need to ask my mom on that.”

“The baby kind, but you already knew that. And I’d rather not.”

Oh, yeah. Apparently, Esmeralda and her mother had some kind of history together. She had no idea what, but she could probably guess given her mother’s past life decisions.

“Well, as much as you’re quite attached to my son, he’s off limits,” she said. “But if that’s what you want, go talk to her. See what her thoughts are. I will warn you though, he might look peaceful there, but you're seeing him at his best. He’s not always that calm.”

"I can imagine," Robin said, catching herself smiling widely at the bundle in her arms.

But yeah. Perhaps she should.

* * *

It was some time later when Alice found Quasimodo sat on the logs beside the remnants of the fire from the previous nights, cradling Zephyr. She sat down on one of the other logs surrounding it.

“Quasi?” He looked up, no doubt seeing her hand in the corner of his vision. He waited for her to sign anything else, but she didn’t really know what she wanted to say.

“Would you like to hold him again?” he asked.

She nodded, and he carefully helped pass the sleeping baby into her arms.

“Are you ok? You seemed a little off, just now,” he signed, concern evident on his face.

“Yeah, I’m ok Quasi. I just have something on my mind, that’s all,” she said, signing back with her free hand.

He shuffled forward to sit closer to her as her attention fell on Zephyr. She looked up as she felt a hand come to momentarily rest on her back.

“I can see it in your eyes. A longing,” he signed, smiling.

“Is it that obvious?” 

He nodded. “It’s written on your face. But you’re sad. You don’t think Robin feels the same way?”

“It’s not that. Or maybe it is… I don’t know.” She paused a moment then, to gaze longingly at Zephyr shifting in her arms. “I want this so badly, and I know we’ve talked about it before, but I… I guess I’m scared she might have changed her mind.”

“Tell her.” She stared at him. “You deserve the chance to have a child yourself, Alice, if that’s what you so choose. And if Robin doesn’t quite feel the same, then I’m sure you’ll be able to sort it out between you. But you both need to know before you can do that.”

“I know, Quasi. I was going to bring it up eventually. I guess seeing Zephyr made me a bit…impatient."

"You'll make a good mother, Alice."

"I hope so. I’ve come so far with my mental health, and I wouldn’t want to do this if I wasn’t ready.”

“Oh, I know you have. I can see it. It’s a part of us, but I know you'll have taken that into consideration."

Zephyr murmered in her arms, and she rocked him lightly as the pair watched him. “Thanks, Quasi,” she said, after some time had passed.

“No problem. Anything for a good friend like you, Alice.”

“Have you been hit by the baby bug, yet?”

He shook his head. “Alas, no. Besides, I would like to meet someone first. And though I’ve met many kind and gracious people, that still might not be the easiest for me, Alice.”

“She’ll be out there, Quasi. I know it!” she signed enthusiastically. “Though I may not be the best person for advice on chatting them up.”

They both desperately attempted to suppress their laughter for fear of disturbing the now soundly sleeping Zephyr.

* * *

Calling her wife over to where she sat next to the fire, Alice’s nerves were all over the place.

“You know, Dinah would love this place. Have you seen the size of the fish around here? They're huge! And some have been getting really close to the shore. I'm gonna try and catch some later, before we head back and-"

“Robin, I want a baby.”

Alice hadn't meant to blurt it out, but the more Robin blabbered on about fish, the more Alice figured she might as well just rip the plaster off in one go.

She wasn’t sure what she expected her to say to that. Or what she’d do. Or the face she’d pull.

Well, her face looked taken aback, she spluttered, and, finally, she said, “Oh.”

“You’re not ready yet,” – she shook her head – “it’s ok, I-I shouldn’t have said anything-”

“No, Alice-!”

“It’s fine, I can wait-”

“No! No, Alice that’s-that’s not it.”

Alice’s stomach dropped. “You’ve changed your mind haven’t you?”

“What?! No!” She grabbed Alice’s hands in hers. “Tower Girl, you’ve got this all wrong. I **want** to have a baby with you! Now!”

Oh.

It took a few seconds for her mind to overcome the initial revelation. But eventually, after a few moments of only being able to stare at her, she said, “You do?”

“Yes!” Robin said, exasperated. “Well, not right now, obviously. But… yeah, I wanted us to start thinking about having a baby.”

“Really? You really want a baby with me?”

Robin nodded, a little shyly. “I was going to wait until we were back home before I mentioned it.”

“Oh, there’s no way I could have waited that long.”

Robin scoffed playfully. “That’s obvious. It’s just… holding Zephyr… it’s like, I was looking at him and I thought, you know, what if… what if I could look at my own son like that? Or hold my own son, or daughter? You know?”

Alice sighed, smiling in relief and excitement. “Yeah. And his little fingers kept reaching up for me and, oh those sweet noises he makes and he's so small and helpless and-” she said, cutting herself off as she looked over at Robin, chuckling as she was. Her eyebrows furrowed, though not to express hurt. “What?”

“I love hearing you say that,” her wife answered, smiling proudly. “But I wanted to make sure I meant it, that this feeling I was having was something I really wanted and wasn’t just my mind getting ahead of itself, or my… monthly hormones messing with my brain. Period broodiness. It’s why I wanted to wait. But then you beat me to it.”

“So… **do** you think you mean it?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I think I do.”

She couldn’t see the state of her own face, but if Robin’s own was anything to go by, the love and excitement she felt with all her heart was evident for the world to see.

Suddenly, she sprung forward, unable to contain the ecstatic joy of the moment, their lips meeting amidst one enthusiastic squeal.

“Here was me wondering if you still wanted this,” Robin admitted, their foreheads resting against the other once they’d pulled back. “But you know, it’ll be a while yet though, whatever way we decide to it.”

“I can wait.” Her hand came up to wrap itself around Robin’s neck, coursing through her hair. “If it means we get to be parents, I’ll sail across any ocean and climb any volcano and cross any desert and… and why I’ll even storm the Red Queen’s castle.”

“It shouldn’t be quite that difficult. Anyway, why do we always have these talks sat beside fires? Strange.” They both giggled, lifting their heads away. “We’ll talk about it properly when we get back, yeah?”

Alice leant her head against her wife’s shoulder, the latter's arm curling around the former's waist and pressing her tighter against her.

“I look forward to it.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> The name of their son is taken from The Hunchback of Notre Dame 2, a DisneyToon's sequel I haven't seen in ages. I won't comment it's quality, but the original's a classic and I'd been wanting to include Quasimodo in particular, given his similar isolated upbringing, for a while now.
> 
> Quasimodo being deaf is from the original novel, something I was unaware of before I started writing this fic, and given OUAT's blending of original and Disney related works, I thought I'd incorporate it here. Again, I hope I've done ok with the representation, but if I've made any mistakes, let me know.
> 
> I don't have any plans or ideas as of right now about including HoND characters again, but I'm certainly open to doing so at some point if I ever think of anything.
> 
> Stay safe everyone, and make sure not to burnout with everything happening right now. Look after yourselves and watch out for each other :)


End file.
